Emotional Brain Training (EBT) is a method I’ve been passionate about for years. Created by health psychologist Dr. Laurel Mellin—who’s still the brilliant force behind it well into her 70s—EBT uses neuroscience-based tools to help us process stuck emotions, recover from stress overload, and rewire our brains for more resilience, joy, and connection.
My passion runs deep. I co-wrote a book about EBT with Master Trainer Judy Zehr. I named this newsletter after the book—Hold On To Yourself (HOTY)—because the ideas inside have been foundational for how I live, lead, and teach. Our book links stress and conflict and offers a map for staying grounded when life gets heated.
One of the cornerstone EBT tools I return to again and again is this: creating micro-moments of joy. Yes, it’s a brain-based skill! And especially in these times, cultivating joy is not frivolous—it’s foundational. It helps lift our hearts, soothe our nervous systems, and rewire us for emotional flexibility.
In EBT, we call this tool “Collecting Joy Points.” The idea is simple yet powerful: every day notice and pause to feel tiny moments throughout our day that spark joy – moments we usually rush by and don’t notice. A warm sip of a morning beverage. Sunlight hitting the wall just right. A memory that makes you smile.
This is age-old wisdom: stop to smell the roses.
But who does stop?
The goal is to collect 10 joy points a day. All of a sudden, you’ve gamified joy! When I practice this daily, I notice the difference! Noticing joy actually starts to rewire the brain’s patterns. The collecting or noticing itself can be easy:
Let’s try it right now. Pause. Take a breath. Can you recall a joyful moment or even a few seconds of a memory – that felt good, warm, safe or joyful?
As I write this, I’m doing it too.
As I reflect, I am thinking of you – yes, you! Writing and sharing what I learn brings meaning and purpose to my life. And it wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying without someone to write for.
The act of noticing joy leads straight into gratitude. So: thank you. For reading. For being someone who wants to grow, lead, and relate with more skill and heart. For being on this path with me.
Did something joyful arise for you? A memory of a place in nature? A pet or a person you love? The coziness of your favourite sweater?
That tiny micro-memory – is a joy point!
You might recognize this idea from other source too:
- Rick Hanson, a Buddhist psychologist, calls it “Taking in the Good”—consciously savouring positive moments to counter the brain’s negativity bias.
- Deb Dana, a clinical social worker, coined the term “glimmers”—tiny cues of safety and well-being that calm the nervous system and reconnect us to our natural brilliance.
I love that collecting joy points—whether you call them glimmers, gratitudes, or good moments—turns joy into a daily brain habit. The hardest part? Remembering to do it. That’s the making it a habit part. That’s the harder part.
That’s where support helps.
Right now, I’m part of an EBT group where we track 10 joy points a day. Having others to share them with helps me stay on track. It turns joy from an idea into a lifestyle.
Want to try it? Invite a friend or loved one to join you in a 10-Day Joy Point Challenge. Share 10 joy points a day with each other. Text, voice note, email—whatever works.
And notice how it lifts your day.
If you try it, I’d love to hear how it goes. Let’s keep sharing tools that bring us home to ourselves and each other.